Monday, March 30, 2009

Going With the Grain

(The current Collection)

Tonight, while on a date at Target, I broke down and bought another package of razors.

You see, I've had an ongoing battle with my face since about the 10th grade.
Actually, the battle has been more with the whiskers rather than the face.

Sometimes, I have won. More often, I navigate through the day by holding my head at an angle so as to hide that morning's skirmishes.

For a season, I was closely following the DE razor scene. Those are the single edge razors that your grandfather or great-grandfather used. I found a great internet site with some real beauties and settled on the Merkur Hefty Classic. And yes, I indulged in a Badger Hair brush!

And the best part of the DE craze was the Taylor of Old Bond Street Shaving Creme. There is no better smell than Taylor of Old Bond Street Shaving Creme. Truth be told, it ended up in other places at times.

The DE craze ended about the time I realized I had spent about two months worth of car payments to shave my face for a few months.

To win the battle, or at least gain temporary advantages, I have sought advice from various sources. These have included but are not limited to:
my father-in-law, the internet, my barber, a professor at law school, my college roommate, a gay magazine, and the movie "Miller's Crossing."

This advice has included:
• never shave against the grain of the hair,
• shave against the grain,
• shave in the morning,
• shave at night,
• get your face really hot and soapy first,
• rinse the razor with cold water,
• rinse the razor with hot water,
• shave the same area twice,
• never make more than one pass on an area, and
• shave in the shower.

There are alternatives to shaving:
• laser treatments,
• plucking,
• depilatory or a topical creme,
• electrolysis,
• waxing,
• sugar waxing, and
• skin grafts (although I've checked, and there is hair just about everywhere except my palms, the bottom of my feet, and the every-increasing area between my eye brows and my hair line).

Fortunately, I seem to have reached an impasse: relatively inexpensive Gillette razors (that get used over and over), hot shower, lots of normal soap, scraping with the grain and against it, and patience.


SteveQ said...

Your missing the obvious alternative of staying hirsute (of course, Mrs. Button may not like that choice).

The Beginning Farmer's Wife said...

Ethan can give you some good tips on facial hair . . .